why you should always eat the cupcake.

The day I got married, I weighed ten pounds less than I do today. Everyone always warned you about the "freshman 15", but I don't remember any warnings about the "marriage 10". I'm here today to share why those last few pounds aren't worth worrying about for another second.

{one of our engagement photos from 2009 - courtesy of Kate Headley; see more here + here}

The reality is that as hard as I try to get back to "wedding shape," I never get there. Recently, I finally accepted it is because I am not supposed to get back there. In the months leading up to our wedding, stress may have aided in my petite size for our big day. {I was working out, but no more than I normally do.} Our wedding day was an absolutely wonderful whirlwind. When we left for our Parisian honeymoon, I gave myself the green light to finally relax and enjoy. 

In the three years and some odd months since our wedding, I made the decision to keep enjoying life like we did in Paris. I love running and going to the gym, but I also love to travel and eat cheese. Finding the balance of these loves is certainly key. There have been times in the last three years when the equilibrium was off {thanks to a stress fracture from marathon training}, but I got back on board as soon as I could.

Thanks to #tbt, I find myself looking at pictures of myself from my early 20s and wish I had that body back. On the other side of the coin, I realize I am much kinder to my body today than I was at age 21. I eat real meals {because I can afford to go out to dinner and not to the dining hall}. I exercise five days a week. I sleep like a semi-normal person. The difference? I let myself have the cupcake today when my younger self would have passed. Does this mean we have the green light to eat whatever I want? No. Everything in moderation, of course. I simply mean that I no longer deny myself the right to enjoy life with food.

I tentatively asked {cv} the other day about this topic. The thing he said which stuck {and actually gave me the courage to finally write this post} was this: We've lived. We've traveled. The weight doesn't make me like you any less than the woman I married--it only makes me love you more.  In hearing that from him, I realized something big: those last few pounds are just the last few pounds.  {cv} isn't going to run for the hills because I weigh a few more pounds than I did on the day we got married. I "earned" that weight over marvelous dinners with my husband, fun nights out with my best friends, and big Italian family dinners. 

At 28 years old, it is pretty weird to look in the mirror and see a body that isn't like the one you had ten years ago. I'm certainly much less tan. I'm much more womanly. I have hips. I no longer have 18 year old boobs. {I said it, not you.} I have a few wrinkles--or as {cv} calls them "smile lines". I'm also old enough to finally accept that I'm not going to have a six pack. {Kudos to those of you who do, but I'm happy in my one-pieces.} I'm not perfect--nor will I ever be. I'm okay with that. I'm making the decision from here on out that what I am is enough. Life is too short not to eat the cupcake {or brownie or ice cream} placed in front of you. 

I'll admit: this was a pretty big topic for a random Thursday. This post has been lingering in the back of my brain for a long time. I always back off out of fear that someone might judge me or say that I actually do look better ten pounds lighter. I don't know what gave me the courage to write this today, but I hope you'll be kind in your comments and give your two cents on the topic. If you take away anything from this post, let it be this: always eat the cupcake. xoxo {av}

DISCLAIMER:  I'm not writing this post to get the "oh, you're so thin" comments. I'm writing this post 
because I think we all deserve a break from the weight rat race--and a cupcake when we want one.